#265 You Absolutely Can Have It All! W/Amber Trueblood

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This week on the Wealthy Wellthy Podcast, I interview best-selling author, speaker, and coach Amber Trueblood!

We met 4 years ago at a women’s Mastermind event (More details-when, where, topic, etc.). As is often the case at Mastermind events, Amber and I shared a lot of interests, and we became instant friends.

In this very personal episode, Amber and I discuss many topics important to me and you. She owns a very successful business and shares some of her most valuable business insights. As a licensed family and marriage therapist, she works hard at maintaining a happy, healthy marriage and gives some important ways you can, too. Additionally, no conversation with Amber would be complete without discussing her FOUR boys! Yes, you can imagine that she has a lot to say about raising children, especially boys, in the Internet Age! We tie these topics together, discussing how to manage them all while saving some time and space for her own needs and sanity.

Amber addresses these topics and more with a real-life perspective supported by her training and practice as a mental health expert. Throughout this personal conversation between two good friends, you get the feeling that you’re sitting in a cozy chair at a coffee shop, sipping on your favorite brew, enjoying some real girl talk.

In This Episode You Will Learn To:

Balance a Satisfying Career and Healthy Marriage While Parenting Without Losing Your Mind
Break Traditional Gender Roles for a Happier and More Efficient Marriage Manage Stress Through Traditional and Non-Traditional Ways
Let Go of Preconceived Ideas About “Should Be” and Embrace “What Is”
Raise Compassionate Children in the Internet Age

Here Are Five of My Favorite Amber Quotes:

Describe your counseling approach?

“I went back to school for clinical psychology and got my master’s in marriage and family therapy, but I found the model that a lot of therapists used to be just not efficient, so I stopped…So now I get to feel that I’m really making an impact with people in a model that is more solutions-focused than just like ‘let’s dig up every trauma you’ve been through.’”

What advice do you have for people wanting to go into business?

“I got my MBA first. Thinking that was like the practical thing to do. And not really realizing at the time that I think I learned more from working in a real business where cashflow matters, where if you don’t meet your bottom line, the business doesn’t exist. And I think that’s the best MBA out there.”

How do you define success?

“At the end of the day, you have to make sure your husband is happy, your kids are taken care of, and you have time to do your business.”

What is different in raising 4 children than 1 or 2?

“I had to teach them very young how to be a little bit more independent and a little bit more self aware than I would have if I had one at a time and maybe they were split out by four years.”

What’s your approach to raising four boys in this complicated age?

“…raising four boys close in age and having them grow up to like hate each other, resent each other, be rude or disrespectful or mean or bully each other was just like, not an option. Like I did not do all this work and have all these people come out of me so that they would grow up and like, resent or hate each other or just be cruel. So we, from a very early, early age, with all the boys…our focus is how do you treat each other with compassion…?

Time Stamps:

[1:47] – Share with everyone a little bit about your story and which brings us to this conversation today.

[3:07] – What was the desire between the family and marriage therapy? And how much time did you spend there? And how is that relevant to your work today?

[7:37] – Talk about your work today. How you manage all these things, keep your sanity, your excitement, and your passion.

[12:32] – What’s behind the scenes of this that is allowing this?

[21:42] – How have you navigated that where it sounds like a good partnership that helps manage all of the house stuff while he’s doing his personal life and business and you’re doing your personal life and business?

[29:07] – Typical communication differences between husbands and wives.

[32:32] – Do you have a way to kind of check overwhelm like a score, like, I am really 10 Plus overwhelmed, something’s got to change. And I don’t know what to do. And because I think that people get in a state that they’re living this way. And they’re, they’re just exhausted every single day with nothing changing. So what do you recommend?

[34:20] – In your new book, unflustered Mom, why are moms flustered, and how do they get flustered?

[38:48] – The meditation component is so vital because it provides a lot of clarity, and when you come out of that, the clarity with which you move forward through your day and realize what’s really important, what’s not, helps alleviate a ton of that stress

[40:00] – How to create a morning routine

[46:22] In your book, you talk about the Super senses. Is this just a kind of self-monitoring self-awareness? Talk to me a little bit about that!

[50:55] – It makes me think to look at little things that bring you joy and happiness, and they can be so small like you said, and for me, I have matcha tea in the morning with steamed heavy cream, and I spend all my time just making it perfect. I’m just so happy to take the first sip.

[53:35] – Well, I love love love the supersenses quiz. So that’s https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/629eb89226324100184228e6

[53:59] – So, your next project is the mecca project. You know not to spend much time, but Macy and I are behind this and just love what you’re doing. So talk about what Mecca is and why you’re doing it.

[58:37] – Tell me what I call a humble brag. What’s something you’re you’re really proud of?

[59:48] – What’s something of a really hard life moment that you might consider a failure or a breakdown that seemed utterly impossible to deal with at the time? Which ultimately became a really good life lesson.

[1:01:09] – Krisstina, if you really, really knew me, you would know that. It’s something that most people don’t really know about you.

Mythbust

That when “it’s meant to be,” it’s going to be easy and conflict-free; I think that is a huge myth that does a big disservice to relationships. Relationships have conflict. How you deal with the conflict and repair it differentiates a healthy relationship from an unhealthy one.