3 Truths About Wealth Nobody Talks About (But Should)
I read every email and comment on the content I put out at WealthyWellthy and every so often I’ll receive some feedback that is insightful, or bold, or thought provoking. I appreciate all of it because my goal is to have a business that is constantly evolving to become better. All the time
A piece of feedback I got after sharing about a vacation I took to Italy required some consideration and thought. The person sent me what I think is quite a courageous comment. (I say courageous because many of you likely had this same thought). Which is… “well it’s easy for you to take 3 weeks to Italy when you’re rich!”
It’s an “us vs them” comment. As though what I have built in my lifestyle is unattainable. That I am privileged in a way that stirs a sense of wanting in others that they feel they can’t ever have.
The truth is, you CAN have it. 3 weeks in Italy or whatever you want.
The reason behind WealthyWellthy and my courses and programs is because you CAN have it AND you deserve it. And I want it for you!
My mission is to teach you what I have learned so that you do create it for yourself. Not to gloat about my millionaire life and the experiences I am having in it to make you feel bad… but to be transparent in this life and extend that offering to you.
If you have been with me for awhile, then you already know my beginnings. But, for those of you who are new to my story, I started my childhood in a trailer. Not a single-wide (that was luxury), but a tiny travel trailer parked on a small lot in a one-stoplight town. I come from a broken-alcoholic family and have been on my own since I was 13.
I know poor. I know broke. I know debt. I know single-momming it and wondering how I would feed my kids. I know despair.
And I’ll never forget it.
So wherever you have been financially, believe me when I say I have been there, too. And I know how to get from “there” to “3 weeks in Europe.” It doesn’t involve a prince, genie or fairy godmother, either.
It involves 3 surprising, life-changing truths. Truths that no one is talking about. But, I will.
Let’s start by getting real.
Truth #1: Money matters… but money isn’t everything.
I’ll start with money – with cash, because it’s where I started.
Growing up poor gave me an insatiable desire for money. From the time I was small, my little entrepreneurial spirit had me selling candy door to door.
I was determined to get out of poverty and never come back.
My whole life became about succeeding, making more. And in my mind, I always thought that my success would help everyone around me. Especially my family.
There was one small problem. This drive to reach the proverbial top left me destitute.
Along the way I lost a marriage. And, with it, all my hard-earned money. Then, several years later in my quest to earn all my money back (and more), my kids nearly lost their mom. All that stress over money coupled with too many toxins led to an excruciating illness and a total breakdown.
How did I end up there after “making it?”
Because my drive for money was my single most important focus, at the expense of everything else.
While your relationship with money is a critical one, you must find that balance between seeking financial freedom and building the other two relationships we’ll talk about in a moment.
There are five almost-never-spoken, counter-cultural truths about money.
Each one of these could be a book, but to get you started I’ll keep it short:
- Money matters. It’s not the root of all evil. In fact, money saved my life (which I’ll tell you about in a moment). Politically correct or not, I’ll say it. Money is crucial. It funds everything you do in life. Your dreams. Your kid’s dreams. It matters. So you have to get your financial life in order.
- Stop buying shit. If you look at the levels of debt and consumerism in this country, you can understand why it’s truly a counter-cultural idea NOT to buy stuff. I still work hard to buy less and question every purchase. (Much of this is based on my new philosophies on money, which I teach about regularly in my money courses and in my Facebook group)
- Buy knowledge instead. Knowledge is power. So spend money on knowledge (especially knowledge about money and health). You’ll find yourself with a lot more to give and a lot more power to transact with.
- Buy experiences. When I was at what I believed to be the end, I experienced a “near-death crisis” complete with deep, painful, agonizing regret. Regret that I didn’t spend more time with my kids. Regret that I spent so much time pursuing success and proofs of success (fancy things). Regret that I’d sacrificed what really does matter most: my health and my relationships. I wish I’d used my money to buy more experiences and memories that I could take with me in lieu of the many things that I could not.
- Don’t forget your health. When you’re sick, all the money in the world doesn’t matter (except to pay the medical bills). And, you can’t enjoy those you love or life itself. So, invest in your wellness. Which by the way isn’t cheap when you desire to achieve optimal health needed for passion, energy, and vitality.
So let’s talk about that.
Truth #2: Your body is your number 1 asset.
The goal shouldn’t just be a certain size or shape – what I mean is investing in true health. Which I define a little differently than the world does. My personal experience has convinced me that cash only matters insofar as it produces health and happiness. In fact, I’ve discovered that wealth and health are equal partners.
When I pursued wealth over health, I got sick. I abused my body with too much stress, too little sleep, wrong diet and too much adrenalin-based exercise. I took my body for granted and pushed it well beyond any reasonable limits in a constant pursuit of “more.”
On the other hand, my wealth enabled me to get well again. It took $250,000 cash to diagnose, treat my illness, and save my life. Without that cash, I wouldn’t be here today. My illness was so rare, to find it and treat it isn’t standard in traditional medicine. My recovery required an integrative and alternative protocol. In simple terms? It wasn’t covered by insurance. At all.
It’s heart-stopping to think what likely would have happened if I hadn’t saved up all that cash in my “Rainy Day Bucket.” That’s REAL. And, that reality is what made me realize how much health matters as much as wealth.
Fund your wellness in every sense of the word: spiritually, physically, intellectually, emotionally and relationally.
That’s a new definition of health.
Health is more than just physical health. It’s feeling good emotionally and psychologically. Spending time on your relationships. Developing your mind. Learning new things. Investing in your spiritual life.
But let’s get real. To be healthy in all of those ways takes money. It does.
Let me get super real and call out our culture on one of the most debilitating lies that is keeping people poor and sick.
It’s this: It’s politically correct to say money doesn’t matter.
That to “live a good life” or a well-thy life is free.
It’s. Total. Bullshit.
To take care of what matters, you DO, in fact, need money. To feed your kids, have Sunday dinner around the table, pay the electric bill, buy supplies for school, drive to church or temple or buy your prayer carpet or have the space and time to meditate.
You don’t need millions.
But, you do need savings and you must be debt-free.
Is there anything more important to living than your body?
Bottom line? There are three simple truths about your relationship with health that are required for a rich life. Truths nobody is talking about.
- Your WHOLE health matters. Not just diet, exercise and drinking water. Health means taking care of your emotions, psychology, relationships, intellect, spirituality, and your body. You can’t live a good life without keeping this mindset about health in the top 3 concerns in your life.
- You MUST start NOW (and every day). By the time a health issue shows up (be it emotional, psychological, physical, relational), it has been tearing your body and relationships down for decades. And by the time it shows up visibly, it takes 10x the effort, time, energy and money to treat. So invest in your health now, so it won’t cost you (and your loved ones) so dearly later.
- Money and Health are equal partners. Money wealth on its own doesn’t matter. Health on its own doesn’t matter. You MUST do both at the same time. To live the best life possible, you MUST have money wealth and total health wealth. Equally. Or, to coin a phrase: be WealthyWellthy.
You must have money wealth. And you must have health wealth. But life doesn’t have much meaning (nor is it much fun) if you live it alone.
Truth #3: Relationships matter.
3rd hard-core truth: Your health and wealth don’t matter if you have shitty relationships. One of the first steps when I recovered my health was getting rid of the toxic relationships in my life.
You become like the 5 people you spend the most time with. Look around. Are the people you have close to you building you up or tearing you down? How much like them do you want to become?
Important questions to ask yourself and reflect on because life is just too short to be around negative, toxic people that will infect your life.
Let’s focus on the single most important relationship in your life: your romantic relationship, your partner or significant other, your marriage.
These relationships matter, without any religious, legal, or political mumbo jumbo.
Partnership and marriage amplifies EVERYTHING you have. (Good and bad).
Two is better than one. Two incomes. Two perspectives. Two people helping out on everything.
Yes, you can live together. But the world organizes differently around married people – culturally, socially, legally, politically. Why do you think marriage equality has been such a big issue? Because marriage matters.
Our culture is confused about marriage today. You don’t need to be married in order to survive and raise families (which was the purpose to be married historically, especially for women). And, you don’t want to be forced into marriages for the sake of familial agendas.
So… what is the purpose of marriage in this new age? Power.
The new marriage equation is super simple:
Marriage = Power
Power to amplify Your Life, Love, & Passion
Power is about amplification (not control)
But getting married doesn’t automatically translate into the kind of power I’m talking about. You have to be equal partners with common passions. Passion comes from having a purpose together. Both believing that the purpose of your marriage is to amplify everything in your life.
Your money. Your health. Your relationships. Your joy. Your love. Your impact in the world. Your ability to protect what you both care about. Everything.
So… what are my truths about marriage given this unique mindset? The “power” of marriage is only possible if…
- You share a common purpose (in other words, you’re on the same journey together and agree on the destination).
- You share the same philosophies, psychologies, promises about what marriage means (and that you agree in the power of amplification in marriage).
- Money is a pillar in your marriage that you both play an equal part in discussing, planning and growing together. And you hold money in a trinity with marriage and health.
- You forsake all else for the purpose you design together (which is really the easy, fun, mind-blowing part, because you share the same passions).
- You take care of yourself first. You can’t be there for him/her if you’re not healthy financially and physically. So, get going on that muffin top and stop buying all that shit.
(See how we’ve come full circle??)
So choose a really kickass partner who is going to join you on your co-envisioned journey to a good life.
Can’t find a partner? Then first define YOUR purpose in life. Get YOUR shit together. Become the person you’d want to be with. Become physically, emotionally, spiritually, psychologically and fiscally healthy. THEN find Mr. or Mrs. Right. Because you’ll be ready to.
What do you think?
I’ve walked the toughest roads in life. It’s taught me a lot. So I’m sharing my triumphs and failures, along with my realizations about truth, so that my journey towards wealth and wellth can help you on yours.
But… and this is a really BIG BUT…
The Final Truth to a Rich Life: YOU Have to Do It
You may have pieced together that everything I have, I’ve produced. I started from a place of disadvantage through Life’s Lottery. And I’ve personally screwed up my life more than once and had to start over. In fact, I’ve failed more than I’ve succeeded!
Over 40+ years of hardship, heartache and struggle. Riches, health and happiness didn’t just appear.
I’ve done the work to “produce” the ability to vacation abroad for several weeks with my family, live in a beautiful home overlooking the hill country, have a massage at least once a week, pay for personal trainers, buy the best money can buy.
That’s the secret. When you’re ready to learn and use that knowledge to amplify your life, you will experience greater wealth and wellth than you ever dreamed possible.
One last thing. Want to know the best part of everything I’ve built? Getting to share all of my secrets with YOU. With full transparency. When life teaches lessons and gives gifts, it is our duty and privilege to share that with the world. I take that responsibility seriously.
Life gave me lots of lemons. You might have gotten a few, too. But I must admit that sitting on the balcony of the Italian villa overlooking the Mediterranean I had the satisfactory thought, “Wow. Never in a million years did I think I’d be here. I did this!”
And so can you.